Dunne is Gone


Today, Manchester City fans should be overjoyed and dancing in the streets. Down south however, in Birmingham, Aston Villa fans should be wearing black and in mourning. Dunne is no more a City player. Dunne might just hold the record for the most own goals in English Premier League history.

Richard Dunne Traded to Aston Villa

Manchester City finally unloaded Irish defender and club captain Richard Dunne to Aston Villa. With the signing of former Everton defender Joleon Lescott, there was no need for Dunne’s services anymore at City.

Not sure how Aston Villa was nutmegged into the signing of Dunne. He is a player who doesn’t defend but creates chances for opposing teams. And they are said to have paid a nearly $10 million transfer fee. Wow.

A few players on Aston Villa in particular should be worried or looking to get some extra practice on corners and set pieces, to prepare for the inevitable Dunne own goals. Those players being the two American keepers with the first name Brad: Friedel and Guzan.

Poor, poor Aston Villa fans, and just when they beat Liverpool for the first time in eight years. I don’t think Villa pull off this 3-1 win against Liverpool if they have Dunne in the back though, even if Friedel is on fire and saving everything that’s thrown at him. Dunne is a crafty fellow, he’s bound to miss time a tackle, concede a free kick, and or deflect a ball into the upper corner of his own goal.

And, the team in general should be doing some extra fitness work and tactical sessions on playing with 10 men, as Dunne is notorious for getting red cards.

Out of all the trades that Manchester City have made this year, signing Tevez, Barry, Santa Cruz, Adebayor, and Toure, getting rid of Richard Dunne has been their best move yet.

Sheikh Mansour of the Abu Dhabi United Group, who’s estimated family fortune is said to be $1 trillion, now has a team that can do some damage in the EPL and the Champions League. I wasn’t convinced while they still had Dunne in their team.

Cell phones are bursting with texts messages right now. He’s finally gone they say. Kids cheer as their dads relay the news: hooray, hooray, no more Dunne in the back.

Dunne is probably the top own goal scorer and red card getting player in the EPL. He is also constantly getting beat and dives in on every occasion. I hate to say it, for his mom’s sake, but he is a disgrace. And he was captain of the Manchester City side no less. I ask how could that be? Robinho must be doing a samba dance right now he’s so happy.

Not sure what Aston Villa manager Martin O Neill is thinking. Does he have a soft spot for Dunne? O’Neill is from Northern Ireland while Dunne is from Dublin, Ireland. I thought the two countries didn’t get along that well.

I know I exaggerate to an extent, as Dunne is a worker, who plays hard and fights for everything. But those abilities are meant more for a league in Ireland and not in the EPL. Or at least not on a team that is trying to compete with Chelsea, Arsenal and Manchester United. It’s like buying new car and driving around with a flat. Dunne was the final player that just had to go. The tire that had to be replaced.

What’s amazing, is one of the last games that Dunne played for Manchester City was at the Camp Nou, where City beat Barcelona 1-0. However, the win is a bit deceiving, as it was one of those games where the posts and the cross bars saved the team from defeat, as Barca went close four, five or six times.

I am sorry Aston Villa fans, and I hope Dunne helps more than he hurts, but I doubt it. Brace yourself for a barrage of own goals and red cards. Dicky ‘Own Goal’ Dunne is now yours to keep.